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Thread: Oh noes, you gor banned/permabanned? Guide for the banned

  1. #1
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    Oh noes, you gor banned/permabanned? Guide for the banned

    Are you in terrible standing with CM Staff and got banned?

    Did you try to appeal your ban and fail?

    Are yousa in big dudu dis time?



    Then yousa worry not, mesa come good guide for you.


    No doubt you are here because you tried to appeal your ban and failed because you got smoked out by the CM staff. But everyone knows, it aint your fault and the ban was undeserving, so you have to get your ban resolved one way or another. Since you tried to play their way and failed cause ppfffft obviously admemes are always wrong when it comes to banning you, it would be smarter to play in a different field.

    Step 1: Make your appeal in Acid Goop

    Try to do this in the traditional appeal section and CM Staff will invade and trash it harder than America invading a country with oil. So obviously you need to post this in a thread where they have 0 reason to remove it and you have to give them 0 reason to remove the post.

    Step 2: Sing a song

    When you tried to communicate via logic and essays and it didnt work, then it's time to play the emotional game. Try gaining sympathy with the staff using songs. The ideal song to do this would be this:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-crgQGdpZR0


    Songs are the best way to attract and woo the attention and sympathy to gain you your case for an ban lift.

    Wait what? What's that? You shitpost/swear when you are underaged? Don't worry kids, repent and sing this song to the staff.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg6W76q6a2E

    Obviously you have to be the one singing this to them, otherwise it feels emotionless and quote 'not enough effort' (hint hint).


    Step 3: Compliment The Staff

    Start with the ones who banned you, handled your ahelp, and of course the ones who replied to your ban appeal. Tell them how great they are, how much nice things they have done to the server.

    But if you think 'Nah that's some weak gay stuff to do to staff' and you wanna up your game, then say no more.

    First, look at them intently at their eyes, like you suddenly realised they are the best thing to you and tell them how much you love them. If you can't see them face to face, then stare at the camera with the same intent and take a photo and post it in your new forum appeal.

    What's that? You haven't got a clue on how to do that? Worry not, I will show you examples of how to do that based on some famous actors of our time:










    Sooo that's all there is to it. If you have followed this step and played the game right then you would've somehow swayed the staff into lifting your ban.

    You are welcome.

  2. #2
    CM-SS13 Host ThesoldierLLJK's Avatar
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    A++++++++ guide would buy again

  3. #3
    Senior Member Vampmare's Avatar
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    I used this guide and it worked really well. Thank you very much.

    10/10
    A small part of the Synthetic Council

    with Jakkk, AcuteCircle, Pedroca2lucas and Kineem

  4. #4
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    I will save this guide for later

  5. #5
    CM-SS13 Host ThesoldierLLJK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Avalanchee View Post
    I will save this guide for later
    Cause you're gonna need it soon

  6. #6
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    Can this help me with EORG? Badmemes hate me

  7. #7
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    if ur banned send me 50 bucks we can talk the details
    Former staff, also former Synthetic senator.

    Now just a shitposter and lurker.

  8. #8
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    What a guide. Sure way to get yousa out of the big dudu.

  9. #9
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    Guide even works in RL! Printed it out at my office and promptly was banned from work for several days. Cheers mate!

  10. #10
    Ancient Member Hunk1's Avatar
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    I got banned and lost my mod status and this guide helped me recovery, A+++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Seller would not buy again.
    and i returned, and left. and returned again 19/06/2022, this is my life now.


    Former Moderator Trainer. If you have any questions regarding Moderation Duties, feel free to DM me: Hunk1#9842

    A bigger truth has never been spoken.

    Props to nanu for the picture.

    My Medals:
    Spoiler Spoiler:

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