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Thread: Ven - Predator Application

  1. #1
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    Ven - Predator Application

    Predator Whitelist Application
    Byond ID:
    Venligen

    Marine Name
    Robert �Dusty� Devine. But lately, I often played as Xeno.

    Name of the Yautja Character you wish to play
    Ra�Grok Torak

    Have you banned in the past month or are currently banned from other servers?
    No.

    Are you familiar with the Predator Code Of Honor?
    Yes.

    Yautja Character Story
    The hunting party was gathering once more. Ra�Grok couldn't afford to miss any opportunities because he had a great responsibility on his shoulders - restoring the honor and significance of his fading clan.
    The elder's voice repeated to him: �Control your rage, pass it through your body, allow it to enter into every muscle, take a step and leave it behind. Give your body and mind freedom. Blind anger leads to irreversible downfall and dishonor, to the meaningless life that the outcast live.� He turned it into his oral ritual.
    Quiet steps were heard in the hall, drawing near to his curtain door. Thoughts broke like a thin thread and spread through the air. He slowly opened his eyes after a hand was laid on his shoulder. Hate of being interrupted overwhelmed him with a wave, rage pierced every muscle.
    �It's time to go or you will miss this hunt,� said one of his many brothers.
    �We have enough time to glorify Thardha and have a feast until every un-blooded finish their preparations,� Ra�Grok growled in response, but shortly after he rose from his knees, hiding grimace on his face and nodding to the hunter.
    ------
    In the main hall of the ship, moans and roars of sparring hunters were heard. The sounds of blows, the clang of dull spears and scimitars filled the mind of everyone around them, they evoked primal instincts in it. Ra�Grok urged to take part in this clash right now, but he curbed his instincts and kept his strength for more able opponents. When all the young hunters were out of breath from repetitive fights, as they began to leave the training grounds, strongest warriors, the Elites started gathering up. These warriors descended from the ragged steps, talking among themselves, discussing their plans for upcoming hunt. Ra�Grok rose from the bench and followed them down.
    His mentor recognized and beckoned Ra�Grok to himself. Both took spears from racks and hit their chest with clenched palms as they took a fighting stance
    �Do you still believe that the fate of the entire clan lies in your hands, Torak?�, He said, not hiding his mocking tone.
    �I hope you stop asking this question when i have a skull of the serpent queen in my collection,� Torak growled in response and delivered the first blow, which was easily repelled.
    The fight was quick, but intense. One mistake cost the younger hunter the whole fight. After he performed a lunge attack with his spear, not keeping his balance and overextending, the more experienced fighter knocked him down with a spear shaft and put a spearhead to his face.
    �This time you stood very well in defense, I'm sure Kehrite is pleased with your thirst for learning. But your unbridled rage in the assault will be the end of you,� said his mentor with a vanity and held out a hand to his apprentice.
    �If I direct it correctly, my anger will be my strength,� answered Ra�Grok with a growl as he rose up on his feet ignoring the hand he was offered.
    A moment later, a training resumed again with even greater dedication.

    Describe how your Yautja acts, and how you intend to play them
    Ra�Grok Torak is very ambitious and confident hunter. He doesn't hunt prey that isn�t stronger than him. Anything weaker is waste of time and effort, since only through pain, effort and purposefulness he can bring honor and reputation to his clan. When fighting a suitable opponent, his ego doesn't allow anything but wristblades to be used.

    In your own words, describe the difference between an honor duel and a hunt
    An honor duel is a consensual fight between two opponents to the death. The duel must be conducted on an equal footing between the fighters. Ranged weapons are forbidden. Only Yautja himself can challenge his prey, with exception for other predators. And on the contrary, the hunt doesn�t have to be agreed between hunter and prey and it is not required to be held on equal terms. Given that prey is worthy, hunter can only use melee and throwing weapons. In most cases, the hunt results in death of one of the parties, but an honor duel does not need to be to the death, in case winner decide to spare his opponent he still can take trophy from them.

    How do you intend on interacting with other predators during a round?
    Meaningless chatter equals lost time and interrupted hunt, even if it�s a moment. Words must be confirmed by actions, as well as justified by intentions. Thus, small talking during the hunt is pointless.
    He is neutral to all but his equal, but he is imbued with deep respect for all whose achievements are greater than him, because these trophies are waiting for him up ahead.

    Why do you want a predator whitelist?
    I always liked a AvP series. Especially riddles and culture hidden behind predator masks. What could be better then unfold them yourself through roleplay?
    This is opportunity to look at everlasting conflict between continuously spreading xenomorphs and marines from different perspective. To be an equivalent force in the midst of battle, holding such power in your hands and applying it to the best interest of other players.

    Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or disobey the Predator Code of Honor?
    Yes

  2. #2
    Whitelisted Predator
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    There is absolutely nothing unique about your application from the dozens of others that have been rejected in the past. You hinted at some tasty bits (Your clan being a fading one) but you never followed through on it, and ultimately you fell in to the "*click *click, me pred, me honorable, me hunt trophy, *click *click* trap.

  3. #3
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    Thank you for your response.
    I understand what you mean and I myself thought about it when I was writing my application.
    I didn�t want to create a character highlighted by his strange quirks. My intentions were to show Ra�Grok history and essence through actions, interactions, charisma.
    However, clan Torak is slowly smoldering due to clan commitment to Kehrit and its tradition that revolves around making their own weaponry and armor. Most Yautja consider studying the art of fire a waste of their time. Members of the clan, however, believe that forged with their own hands incorporates the essence of the deity, the thoughts of the hunter and his physical strength, becoming one with its possessor.
    His clan is his motivation to hunt. His fame and honor equals to the reputation of the clan. But his temper leads to his inability to show real might behind his tradition except for hunting and fighting.

  4. #4
    Senior Member x31stOverlord's Avatar
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    See, your response is what I want to see in your story. I've read and seen so many generic me hunt click clack honor stories. Let me see the plight of the clan, why they live as they do, what your Pred is going to do about it.

    I don't quite recognize your ckey from the top of my head which is another negative, I am less willing to support people I've never seen or had any interactions with.

    Overall whilst I see a potentially great story in the making, it wasn't quite enough this time.

    -1
    Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL
    Roscoe Barrett - CMP, MP, Spec
    Joshua - Synthetic
    Zathar-Veraz - Yautja
    Xenomorph - L-0-RD
    Ex Badmin Manager

  5. #5
    Whitelisted Predator MattAtlas's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by x31stOverlord View Post
    See, your response is what I want to see in your story. I've read and seen so many generic me hunt click clack honor stories. Let me see the plight of the clan, why they live as they do, what your Pred is going to do about it.

    I don't quite recognize your ckey from the top of my head which is another negative, I am less willing to support people I've never seen or had any interactions with.

    Overall whilst I see a potentially great story in the making, it wasn't quite enough this time.

    -1
    This pretty much.

    -1
    Resident ex-punished Junior Developer and Coder, and ex three-time member of the Yautja Council, two-time member of the Synth Council.

    See with your eyes, my army of flies, when no one's alive...

  6. #6
    Senior Member Lumdor's Avatar
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    Easy -1 from me chief.

  7. #7
    CM-SS13 Host ThesoldierLLJK's Avatar
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    You had something going, but then you blew it. By not finishing it and doing the generic I HUNT I FOLLOW CODE CLICK CLACK crap.

    Shame

    -1

  8. #8
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    I played CM for about three years now, but more often at low pop.
    You know, you want fairly high standards in writing history, although it does not show the player�s ability to get used to the role and don't die from the delta-rush immidiatly.
    At the moment, most of the predators I have seen are not able to bring any positive moments into the round, or show the depth of their characters and story, when the most advantageous option for both xenomorphs and marines is ignoring them.
    I also do not understand how otherwise a species, in whose culture honor and hunting are deeply laid, must be played. Everyone expect exactly "click-click, muh traps" and lodge-rp secondary to that. It doesn't mean its bad, because you can make that interesting for everyone around you, but that does mean that having so much restrictions and not giving people a chance after they put effort into making whitelist application is at the least is absurd.

  9. #9
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    Everything was said above.

    -1

  10. #10
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    Use the whitelist app help channel next time buddy

    -1
    The French Madmen: Capitaine Renaud 'Sierra' Chatillon

    Almaric, the history teacher synthetic


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