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Thread: Guacamole Nigga Penis, the Chronicles of Man

  1. #1
    Junior Member FrenchFry's Avatar
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    Guacamole Nigga Penis, the Chronicles of Man

    Chapter I
    At the beginning there was only dark, then Guacamole Nigga Penis was created from nothing, it has shaped the universe to its liking. But it felt lonely, so it created the Earth, filled it with fauna and flora, but it still wasn't fulfilled, that is how Man came to be, Guacamole Nigga Penis needed someone to worship it.

    At first, it all went good and the Man was grateful for his creation, but then one of them bit the penis that fed him by eating from the forbidden Taco Bell. Guacamole Nigga Penis was furious about this, but it realised that it simply cannot control every action of Man, therefore it only watched and provided only for those truly devoted believers.

    Chapter II
    As the Man kept developing and Guacamole Nigga Penis watched, one stood above the rest with his devotion, his name was Hesus, so Guacamole Nigga Penis showed his appreciation by granting him great powers, this was the creation of the first Unga.

    Hesus was wandering around the Earth with his newly acquired powers, helping the mankind and keeping them away from conflict, this however, would prove to be his downfall, for he could DELET a man with a slap, he decided to be a pussy pacifist. Guacamole Nigga Penis has seen this, and he saw it was good.

    Chapter III
    Now this is a story all about how
    My life got flipped-turned upside down
    And I'd like to take a minute
    Just sit right there
    I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air

    In west Philadelphia born and raised
    On the playground was where I spent most of my days
    Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
    And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school
    When a couple of guys who were up to no good
    Started making trouble in my neighborhood
    I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
    She said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air"

    I begged and pleaded with her day after day
    But she packed my suitcase and sent me on my way
    She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket
    I put my Walkman on and said, "I might as well kick it"

    First class, yo, this is bad
    Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass
    Is this what the people of Bel-Air living like?
    Hmm, this might be alright

    But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois, all that
    Is this the type of place that they just send this cool cat?
    I don't think so
    I'll see when I get there
    I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air

    Well, the plane landed and when I came out
    There was a dude who looked like a cop standing there with my name out
    I ain't trying to get arrested yet
    I just got here
    I sprang with the quickness like lightning, disappeared

    I whistled for a cab and when it came near
    The license plate said "Fresh" and it had dice in the mirror
    If anything I could say that this cab was rare
    But I thought, "Nah, forget it"
    – "Yo, home to Bel-Air"

    I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
    And I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo home smell ya later"
    I looked at my kingdom
    I was finally there
    To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air

    Chapter IV
    When Hesus came to the land of Nipple, he was greeted warmly by the people of the land, however when the government heard of this illegal immigrant, they decided to do a drive-by on his ass, once the deed was done, Guacamole Nigga Penis was furious, so it restarted the planet, wiping all the life on it. Then some idiot called God came and claimed the planet, what an asshole.

    That is how the Guacamole Nigga Penis was forgotten in the sands of time.
    yes
    i agree

  2. #2
    Senior Member Akabinxstar's Avatar
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    Bruh.

  3. #3
    Junior Member BND01's Avatar
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    Thank you FrenchFry, very cool
    Scott Focell, one of the many dead marines on the colony, unless I'm not dead.

  4. #4
    Admin ThesoldierLLJK's Avatar
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    What the fuc-

  5. #5
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    bruh moment
    CDRE James-Frederick Cerwick
    Trial Moderator: 4/18/2019 - 5/2/2019 | Moderator: 5/3/2019 - Present

    I am a member of the CO Council along with Arbs, Frans_Feiffer, Imheretohelp, and Taketheshot56. Feel free to message me if you have any questions, concerns, or comments about the CO role.
    Discord: Scsnv#7836

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    thanks

  7. #7
    Member ScreamingIdiot's Avatar
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    i regret being literate

  8. #8
    Member Casada_Radio's Avatar
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    Main: Yuri Gennady Gregorovich

    Others:
    Amare Babatunde Jabari
    Go Mei Sin
    Wilson Alfred Longshanks



  9. #9
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    Truly, a story to rival such masterpieces as 'shrek is love, shrek is life' and 'My Immortal'

    (If you haven't read my immortal, please don't. It's actually that bad'

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