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Thread: [WITHDRAWN] Anderut22 - Yautja Application

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    [WITHDRAWN] Anderut22 - Yautja Application

    Yautja Whitelist Application
    Byond ID:
    Anderut22

    Marine Name
    As marine I play Claire O'Reilly but you might know me as the Synthetic Cassie!

    Name of the Yautja Character you wish to play
    Kre'Zuhl

    Have you banned in the past month or are currently banned from other servers?
    No, I have not been banned from any SS13 server in the past month!

    Are you familiar with the Predator Code Of Honor?
    I've given the Code of Honor a few solid read-throughs and I feel that I am quite familiar with it!

    Yautja Character Story
    "Praised be your name, Kehrite, Aspect of Strength!", Kre'Zuhl said, while kneeling before his God's altar, polishing a broken lonsgword. The sparks filled the dusty, damp air of his ancient lodge, and the moonlight crept through a small crenel, shining on a centuries' old Maximilian armor; despite its' age, it was in prime condition.

    "Praised be your name, for you inspire us with courage, and lead us on a path of eternal betterment!"
    The Yautja's words echoed through the lodge's trophy room, its' racks filled with old human weapons and armours, each from a different civilization, and from a different era. On one rack you could find swords, on another maces, on yet another rack prototype nano-blades, and next to each weapon, a polished skull bearing a helmet could be found.

    All the weapons were intact and perfectly-maintained, despite their age. But out of all these sets, a single one drawed all your attention; a beautifully-ornate longsword, adorned with a ruby, was placed on a centuries-old sandstone rack, next to a skull bearing a steel helmet with a cracked visor. It stood just behind Kehrite's altar, and it belonged to one of Kre'Zuhl's first, and greatest, hunts...

    ================================================== =======================================

    It was a damp, cold afternoon, and the stench of blood and death filled the air. The ground was muddy, and hard to traverse; it was difficult even for a Yautja to hunt here. Kre'Zuhl quickly understood what happened here, when he observed the dead horses and the mass of dead bodies impaled by plenty of arrows.

    "The fools must've charged across the battlefield in full armor. They had not prepared enough. They did not think, and Kehrite had punished them all.", Kre'Zuhl thought for himself. It seemed that the humans bearing the standard of the three golden lions had won, and were burning what seemed to be a standard displaying three golden flowers on a blue field. The latter standard reminded Kre'Zuhl of a certain human...

    "...no. He surely thought better. He wouldn't have made that mistake...", Kre'Zuhl said for himself, then quickly ran into the woods of the Aging Court, engaging his cloak and jumping from tree to tree. The forest was a quieter place, and the cheering of the archers was quieter here. Fewer bodies could be found, and even fewer arrows were seen; the bodies bore the golden lions' mark instead, and seemed to have been struck down by mighty longsword blows.

    After just a few more jumps, Kre'Zuhl spotted what seemed to be a pyramid of bodies. A lone, hulking man clad in plate armour, carrying a beautifully-ornate longsword adorned with a ruby, still fought a young squire. A single mighty blow with the sword's hilt sent the young one flying, disarming them; a vile cracking sound could be heard after his body impacted a tree's trunk.

    "Please... n-no! I yield! I YIELD!" cried out the young squire, while crawling away in fear. Only death could wash away the dishonor brought by such a pathetic move; and the young one's death was quickly and silently granted by the hulking knight, the longsword decapitating them in one fell slash. The man then raised his visor, inhaled... and his vision quickly met Kre'Zuhl's.

    "It is him. He trained well, and Kehrite guided him in battle, it seems...", the Yautja said for himself. It was, indeed, the young boy he met some years before the battle of the Aging Court; a small, starving, nameless street urchin, with nothing better to do but steal and cut purses. It was Kre'Zuhl who guided him and steered him onto a rightful path, of dueling and training; he fought the Yautja's best thralls and succeeded, despite being way younger, and proceeded to become one of the local dukes' most loyal knights.
    But, just like he gave him the life he had, Kre'Zuhl was going to take it all away; it was his duy, as a faithful of Kehrite, to train the prey, then slay it, to bring greater glory upon himself and greater praise to his God.

    The Yautja jumped down from the tree, and uncloaked, unsheating his clan sword in one single motion.

    "...so, you've come back. What is it you're looking for? You'll find no youth to train here. I've slain them all.", said the knight, resting on his blade and gazing at the Yautja.

    "It is time for your culling, young one.", Kre'Zuhl said emotionlessly, gazing upon his opponent's blade... and nodding. It was appropriate; in another Yautja's hands, it would've sufficed for a duel, and the knight was strong enough to wield it properly.

    "I remember your words, now. Last time we met, you promised we'd meet again, and that you will have my head...", the knight shouted, while readying his blade...

    "...know that it shall not happen today!" The knight shouted a battle-cry, then charged the Yautja, attempting a sweeping strike! Kre'Zuhl promptly jumped over it, landing behind the massive knight, swinging his own blade only for the blow to be parried away. A clash of swords ensued, and it seemed like the combatants' skills were matched; the knight parried away every blow, and Kre'Zuhl dodged every slash, deflecting some blows once in a while.

    It took a while until the knight tired; his blows were getting weaker, his reflexes being dulled aswell. He had lost his patience, and swung wildly, embedding his longsword in a tree's trunk. This sole mistake was all it took for Kre'Zuhl to slay the knigh; he impaled him with the clan sword, cut off his intestines, then promptly decapitated him, taking the longsword, the helmet and the head in his pouch. It was a great hunt, and he would remember this prey for a good while after.

    "Praised be your name, Kehrite, Aspect of Strength! Praised be your name, for you inspire us with courage!", clicked the Yautja, before going back to his vessel.

    Describe how your Yautja acts, and how you intend to play them
    Kre'Zuhl is a worshipper of Kehrite Bhu'ja, the Demigod of Training and Duels; this is reflected in his belief of life itself being a mere training exercise, and that he must improve as much as possible. He is extremely perseverant, and will never, ever stop from finishing his task, assuming it does not go against the Honor Code at any point in time. He believes that the prime method of worshipping Kehrite is to duel the most worthy of prey, and to ensure that the prey is sufficiently trained.

    Kre'Zuhl can usually be spotted with a Clan Sword, prowling the hunting grounds, looking for a worthy prey to train and duel. Of course, that is after he builds a dojo-like training lodge. Once he spots such a human, and decides that they are indeed worthy, he would guide them on a path of honorable combat, giving them short quotes from the Honor Code and small lectures, but being wary not to divulge too much of Yautja culture to the humans. Once he believes that the prey's sufficiently trained, he would provoke them to a Honor Duel in his lodge, and fight to the death; he never gives mercy, and would never accept it either.

    If he would not find any worthy humans, Kre'Zuhl would ask his fellow hunters for a training duel; this would come usually before the hunt commences, or after the marines evacuate. Of course, hunting the Serpents is yet another option; between human observation sessions Kre'Zuhl spends time stalking the most worthy of the aliens.

    In your own words, describe the difference between an honor duel and a hunt
    A honor duel is when a Predator decides to fight a worthy prey, or another Predator, in melee combat to the death. While in a honor duel the Predator should ensure that the other combatant possesses a proper melee weapon, and should ensure that the combatant recovers from knock-downs, such restrictions do not exist in a standard hunt. Also, the Predator could show mercy to the combatant; this is frowned upon during hunts!

    A hunt is when a Predator decides to stalk, analyze, observe, and kill, a worthy prey. During hunts Predators should use melee weapons but they are not expected to let the prey recover from stuns, and they may use ranged weaponry in the unhappy case an unworthy prey interferes with the hunt.

    How do you intend on interacting with other predators during a round?
    In order to better himself, Kre'Zuhl would usually accompany fellow Predators and observe their hunting style and choice of weaponry. If they would be lesser experienced, he would offer to tutor them, as he would both be aiding them, and worshipping Kehrite at the same time; after all, the Demigod of Training would love his faithful to be masters aswell, and help better other hunters!

    If any Predators were to insult Kehrite or his rather dubious habits, Kre'Zuhl would simply laugh in their faces, for he believes that Kehrite himself is testing his patience. He would find the insults a mere training exercise in patience, and would quickly, and calmly, provide counter-arguments, trying to defuse the tense situation.

    Why do you want a predator whitelist?
    I thoroughly enjoy the special type of RP CM offers, and I love all the HRP roles the Almayer and the colony offer! I like RP'ing with everyone as a Corporate Liaison, and especially as a Synthetic.

    I believe that I would be able to access more RP avenues as a Predator, and I could engage more people in my fun RP scenarios, especially with my gimmick! During my rounds I noticed that very few Predators do engage in RP, and mostly choose to hunt; I plan on being a more chattery Predator, and I think this might help rounds end up more enjoyable, for me and the rest of the playerbase alike!

    Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or disobey the Predator Code of Honor?
    Yes

  2. #2
    Senior Member Lumdor's Avatar
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    This reads like an edgy predator anime where you use a samurai sword.

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    The gimmick will be interesting so long as you don't take it overboard, remember that the primitive humans are not worthy of learning overmuch of our culture. I like the dedication you show in the story of collecting armour and skulls and cleanly arraying them around the lodge, it would be interesting to see you maintain this in game. In my experience lodges have mostly gone out of style due to the effort required to make them, so I would be pleased to see you pull this off.

    You have proven yourself competent in Roleplay as you already have both the CO and Synthetic whitelist. I believe you would be an excellent Yautja Hunter.

    I look forward to seeing you on the hunting grounds.
    +1
    Charles & Arthur Edwinson
    Synth Percival | Artyom
    Yautja Kjhute Luar-ke

    Record:
    Spoiler Spoiler:



    Discord: forest2001#2001

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lumdor View Post
    This reads like an edgy predator anime where you use a samurai sword.
    And even saying that is giving it alotta credit. Frankly i don't like it, it reads badly and runs out of steam just as it manages to draw interest. Just as it gets to the only interesting part of the story you decide to just round things off and wrap it up quickly. Its lazy and sloppy. With how well forest is speaking of you id really hope and expect more from someone with the other two whitelists. -1 sorry i think you can do better by a large margin
    Last edited by 420M.Y.K; 08-20-2019 at 01:11 AM. Reason: Spelling, grammar
    H'chak Best click clack.

    Alice 'Snow' Falkner: The one TRUE snowflake.

    Lurker 420 Points at the dank weeds.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Nicksone's Avatar
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    First of all, glad to see your application coming through after I've heard about it for a short while now.

    Now to the application itself. Mediocre. Mediocre at best. It doesn't make much sense to me. Yautja's are renowned hunters, hunters of worthy prey. It makes no sense for a Yautja to share their techniques and teachings, passed down to them by the elders of their clan, to random prey because they have potential.

    We scour for worthy prey or prey that proves themselves in combat. We don't go around teaching them to be better.

    To be fair I expected more. Double whitelist, succesfull in both roles and good in RP. To me this application doesn't cut it if I look at the person who wrote it and what they have achieved already.

    -1
    "Don't make me put this beanbag in a place where it fits marine."


    Medic/Doc : Nick 'Bitter' Sweetwater
    Predator : Aenth An'th

  6. #6
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    Thank you all for the feedback!
    I think I'll withdraw this, and come back in 2 months with a better story. And a better gimmick to boot!
    Claire O'Reilly, the vitriolic Corporate Liaison!
    Cassie, the helpful Synthetic!
    Kre'Zuhl, the self-declared greatest worshipper of Thardha!

    HRP Main to the Bone

  7. #7
    CM-SS13 Host ThesoldierLLJK's Avatar
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    Good player, but the "quirk/gimmick" like nick said won't work

    SHAME CASSIE

    shame...

  8. #8
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    Withdrawn as of today.

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