I always knew the day would come but I guess I just didn't want to accept it would. I always felt that I'd have a lot to say in this post but really, now that I'm here, I don't quite feel like there is much to say.
I guess I should start by saying that my retirement is overdue. I was not forced into retirement but talking to Jamie regarding recent events has made me realize that I'm only sticking around because I don't want to leave, not because I still hold the same passion I use to. While even to this day CM holds a special place in my heart, the past months have lead to frustrations and burn-out, culminating to honestly just resenting having to work here. When I tried to spur myself back into doing stuff, the anger of recent events only lead me to venting my frustration onto others. If Grimcad hadn't talk sense into me a lot of the time, I'd have made myself even more of a fool. For that, I am sorry.
Though I feel like I could put a whole list of my crowning achievements right about here, such a list may just be too long or amazing to be contained in a single post. Instead, I'd like to thank everyone for playing a part in making CM what it is, be it just another player adding their RP to the server or the mods, devs, and admins spending countless hours keeping this server running. I know we all want to kill each other sometimes, well maybe most of the time, but in the end we're still one fucked up family so try to make the best of times while we all got it. Remember that CM is most literally what we all make it. CM isn't just another game with some dev cycle and people just going along with it, CM is the very RP we all make each round and the laughs we have afterwards. So make sure to give it some passion and help make CM the best it can be for all future players.
I'll end by saying when I joined as a trial mod back on May 29th, 2017, if you told me I'd someday end up as Vice Host, I'd never have believed I'd get or even want something on this random, cheap-looking game that I only became a mod on due to a friend asking me to join. Yet throughout all the high-highs and low-lows of CM, I stuck around and found something I quite cared about in life. When I first started playing CM, I was in a bad spot in life. While all you autistic fuckers didn't make life any easier, getting to be part of this community did make my life better and I'm glad I got to join in. Thank you everyone, for not just helping me, but for being part of CM and helping others as well. There are a lot of you who may be going through the same issues and while you will disregard this as just another person saying it, things will get better if you're at that bumpy part of life, I promise ya.
While some people will be sad to see me leave, and some happy, just remember to make the best of the times we got with CM. Like all good things in life, you can't have it forever. Take care everyone, while I'll lurk around in the community, I'm going to be taking the good years and countless memories I've had with you all and cherish what I had.
Love all you bald, FF'ing ungas. ~Emerald