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Thread: Rules Lawyer For Hire

  1. #1
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    Rules Lawyer For Hire

    As featured on the W-Y Times Gazette "Player's fighting notes, and winning!"

    Due to the current state of affairs Hawke is currently limiting his practice to unjust ban infractions.

    Hawke has been a Rules Lawyer for 2 years in the western quadrant of the Milky Way Galaxy.

    A note on your account regarding failing to cryo after going SSD as spec, accidentally setting off multiple grenades in briefing, or force feeding someone copious amounts of medication will impact your account for several years.

    If you are looking for a Rules Lawyer within the Almayer to represent your case against an unjust ban, Hawke can help.

    Hawke has a very high success rate of keeping his clients note history clean.

    If you were noted improperly for something, or an unjust ban is being processed, please send me a DM for a FREE consultation.

    DISCLAIMER: Hawke 'Hotwheels' Blokkum has not passed the bar exam for Rules Lawyering. Hawke does not have a successful record of removing notes from players accounts and has in fact has lost all of his appeals. By reading the following wall of text you have entered into an implied contract with Hawke 'Hotwheels' Blokkum and will provide him with all of your space credits in the game upon round start. In addition, this supersedes all previous disclaimers
    Entire contents (c) 1999 by Blokkum Communications, Inc. This disclaimer is protected by copyright and its use, copying, distribution and decompilation is restricted. All rights reserved. No part of this disclaimer or any attachments may be copied or reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means, optical, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, telepathic, or otherwise, without the express witnessed and notarized prior written consent of the all holders of the relevant copyrights.
    The information contained herein has been obtained from sources believed to be reliable. However, no warranty as to the accuracy, completeness or adequacy of such information is implied. No liability is accepted for errors, omissions or inadequacies in the information contained herein or for interpretations thereof. The reader assumes sole responsibility for the selection of these materials to achieve its intended results. The opinions expressed herein are subject to change without notice.
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  2. #2
    Whitelisted Predator
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    This is more Acid goop material.

  3. #3
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    Know all men by these presents, that I, Hawke 'Hotwheels' Blokkum of the USS Almayer have made, constituted, appointed, and by these presents do hereby make, constitute and appoint to the fact that this thread should be moved to back to it's original position within the general forum.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by HBlokkum View Post
    Know all men by these presents, that I, Hawke 'Hotwheels' Blokkum of the USS Almayer have made, constituted, appointed, and by these presents do hereby make, constitute and appoint to the fact that this thread should be moved to back to it's original position within the general forum.
    Greetings, Friend Blokkum. Like many people, I participate in the server without fully informing myself of the relevant guidelines and rules. I have a appeal for a 'sticky ban' which was mis-labelled. I also bumped the post, and replied to notes while the rules forbidding all of these activities was available.

    It's been 5.5 days, a admin duo was assigned to the case to 'uncover a second account linked' to my IP address. I play Grijk Bulcher, Theodore Simmons, and Sparkles MacDonaghue. Anyone who has ever seen the characters perform would probably stare blankly if the allegation they were meta/powergaming was uttered.

    Is there anything you can do in regards to my appeal (which I austicly f*cked up), after 22/07/2020? Six days seems to be the standard response time for the admins and I don't want to antagonize them further. I'm also interested in discovering what info they have regarding a 'second account linked' to my IP address, for personal reasons. I have one and a half boxes of crayons, a plushie farwa, and a bike horn to offer in compensation. Plus whatever is in my payday account, engineers draw a little more water than pfc's.

    Respectfully yours,

    Fred Dingles

  5. #5
    Junior Member capitulinagarage's Avatar
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    At first it may seem that we are talking about a real lawyer for hire. Lol

  6. #6
    Junior Member aythamyausti's Avatar
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    It's so serious that I think we're talking about a real court case here, too. I was in a courtroom once. My uncle was hit by a car and the person who caused the accident was trying to run away. My uncle was badly hurt in that accident, but in the end the case was solved in his favor. Then we went to a personal injury attorney to help us get justice. Such events in real life turned out to be much more interesting than any game, but I hope that nothing like that will happen again. That's cool, but my uncle probably wouldn't want it to happen again. Lol
    Last edited by aythamyausti; 01-11-2023 at 11:19 AM.

  7. #7
    Ancient Member Tails of Akira's Avatar
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    why is he banned
    Former Mentor. now literally doesn't exist.
    Some dipshit moved my cryosleep post to general not mad or anything just confused.
    I was one of the old players on CM, and wanted to be a mod and CO once, now I can't.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tails of Akira View Post
    why is he banned
    Fuck around rules lawyering....and you find out.
    Felix the Synth: hat fanatic, nice robot, one time double agent almayer synth executed for sedition. Occasional murderous mopbot.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Copper Wilson's Avatar
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    i only want for beardedwall to be my lawyer.

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