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Thread: HBlokkum - Yautja Application

  1. #1
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    HBlokkum - Yautja Application

    Yautja Whitelist Application
    Byond ID:
    drkln

    Discord ID
    Hawke#6420

    Marine Name
    Hawke 'Hotwheels' Blokkum

    Name of the Yautja Character you wish to play
    Le Ch'Ef

    Have you read the honor code and do you understand that if you breach the honor code you may be subject to disciplinary action and have your whitelist revoked for a set amount of time?
    Hai!

    Name and history of your Yautja’s clan:
    Coul'en'Arre

    This is a clan of Yautja's dedicated to the art of predatory cooking. While others may best each other through cuts, slashes, and stabs upon the flesh of their foes, the clan of Coul'en'Arre conquers their foes through their taste buds. Improper knife use is deeply frowned upon in this clan, they look down at the other lesser clans who cut their meat against the grain and season their food with herbs and spices as opposed to the salty tears of their bested culinary combatants. They are known to travel across the galaxy, challenging chefs to cook offs and taking a prized cooking instrument from their defeated foes and adding it to their collection.

    If one of this clan is defeated in a duel however, they must stay and pledge themselves to apprenticeship under those that they have been bested by. Only upon successful completion of their culinary apprenticeship are they allowed to leave the planet and return in shame to their clan.

    They also have a tradition of broadcasting various informational cooking shows on Yautja Prime. It is known that the first instance of recorded human awareness of the Yautja was in 1988 when the signal from their television show was set too strong and overrode the Cooking With Martha Stewart show on Planet Earth. It was at this point the corporation became aware of the existence of the Yautja and was able to triangulate the coordinates of their home world from this broadcast.

    Yautja Character Story
    Le Ch'Ef watched the beginnings of the broadcast from above in his cloaked vessel. The holy culinary ritual of the humans was starting. For a century he had watched this televised ritual, and had dreamed one day of competing against the most worthy of prey, the one who won almost every tournament without fail. Unfortunately, in 2027 his prey vanished without a trace. Panicked, he resolved to track him down by any means necessary. Through a coincidence of events, he was able to trade a large amount of predator weaponry to the Weyland Yutani corporation for the whereabouts of this one man... As he could hear the crowd cheering from the large television behind him he knew the contest was beginning to start, and so he began the slow process of donning his sacred culinary artifacts and descended onto the now colonized planet of LV624.


    The Great Great Great Great Grandson of Chairman Takeshi Kaga walked upon the grand stage of the Kitchen Colosseum.

    "Now, onto the contestants! To my left, is unequivocally the best chef that has ever existed! Cryogenically frozen in 2027 by being accidentally locked in a walk-in freezer and now completely thawed I present Iron Chef Masaharu Morimoto!" Whistles and cheers came from the crowd as the ponytailed, and pleasantly thicc Iron Chef brandished two meat cleavers and spun them around expertly before holstering them back in their sheaths.

    "And our next guest!" Kaga-san shouted, dramatically extending a hand to one of his assistants proffering a white card.

    Something red was dripping off the card, something was also off about his assistant. He walked awkwardly with his arms and legs making exaggerated swinging motions as if someone invisible was behind him and making him walk like a puppet. His wide-eyed assistant kept opening and closing his mouth in shock, as if trying to say something.

    Kaga-san chided his assistant for his awkwardness and played it up for the crowd. "Even my assistant cannot believe who the challenger is for this monumental battle!" Kaga-san then glanced at the stained card. He squinted, trying to decipher the text or find some clever joke. "I swear to the Kami, if my producer wrote this in Wingdings as a practical joke I will order him to commit sudoku!" Kaga-san harshly whispered under his breath. He then cleverly thought of another way to play this off. "The challenger needs no introduction! He shall introduce himself!" the host casually flicked the card behind his back and waited for the grand debut.

    "P-puhredator onegaishimasu." his assistant quietly gasped as he fell to the ground beside Kaga-san, blood pooling around his body. Suddenly, a massive humanoid shape began to coalesece in front of the crowd.

    Kaga-san gasped with shock, and then again with excitement. "Wow! Weyland Yutani must have upped our budget for this season, the special effects are incredible!" he thought to himself with a smile.

    The crowd went wild.

    Le Ch'Ef made a low grumbling noise as he sized up his contestant. He had been waiting for this moment for a whole century. His victories over the chefs in the interim seemed hollow. He slowly glanced at the trophies acquired over the many decades that now adorned his body. The spatula of Joel Robuchon hung at his side, the Brietling Aeromarine Chrono Avenger M1 from Gordon Ramsay which was strapped on his wrist, an infra-red thermometer from Emeril Lagasse that was now retrofitted to his plasmacaster, and last but not least, his combi-stick, the spearhead exchanged with the giant whisk used by Chef Boyardee from his factory in Ohio.

    Iron Chef Morimoto's lips quivered as he shouted " モンスター!(MONSTER!)" repeatedly while pointing a finger at the eight foot Chef de Carnivoré.

    Kaga-san stepped in front of the crowd, "Now, the wisdom of my forefathers has dictated that the most simple of ingredients bring out the best qualities of a chef. For today's challenge..." He quickly ripped a thick silk cloth revealing the secret ingredient. "OHHHH MY GOD! ホーリーシット!(HORI SHIT TO!)" he shouted in a panic. Unbeknownst to Kaga-San, Le Ch'Ef had translocated the quail eggs with xenomorph eggs an hour ago. One of the eggs began to unravel as a facehugger latched itself to the host.

    The crowd continued to cheer in a frenzy, Weyland-Yutani Television Broadcast Metrics was now clocking this event fifty thousand percent over expected viewership. It seemed as though everyone within the western quadrant of the Milky Way Galaxy was now tuning into this broadcast.

    Le Ch'Ef put his massive foot ontop of the infected chairman and let out a deafing roar as he unholstered a small butterknife from his wrist and threw it at a button below a giant clock.

    For one moment in bright neon red, the clock read 60:00. Then it read 59:59.

    From the stands above the Kitchen Colosseum, two announcers looked at eachother with glee.

    "Wow wow wow! It looks like the culinary battle of the century has commenced! Let's get thing's rolling here. As always, I'm Barblo 'Bean Boy' Babkins, and this here is my Co-Host Dick 'Didgeridoo' Soupcan! Take it away Dick!"

    "Barblo, we were all told last year that this was going to be the the greatest battle at Kitchen Colosseum that we have ever seen, and you know what I can say with certainty THAT is the truth!"

    "The battles only just started Dick but I wholeheartedly agree!"

    "At a glance though, I'd say this seems a little one sided. Morimoto has 3 sous-chefs at the ready but it seems like our otherwordly contestant is going in solo, how do you think he will manage?"

    "Well Barblo, honestly I can tell this creature is that of pure determination, I mean look at it!" As one of the cameramen zooms in on Le' Ch'ef, the predator notices and flexes his rippling fishnet covered biceps and prominent abs while undulating his four fanged mandibles. "That thing is all muscle, it must weigh as much as all of Morimoto's chefs combined, look at it! It's more shredded than a julienned salad!"

    Morimoto stood in shock as though frozen in time, two minutes have already passed on the clock and his sous-chefs are now crowding around him shouting encouragement in Japanese. "Morimoto-san! Ganbatte!" they shouted in unison. He had been defrosted by the corporation just two weeks prior and was still getting the hang of how things worked here in the future.

    The heated words from his companions began to thaw the icy exterior that was encapsulating the Cretaceous-Era Chef.

    "Yosh!" Morimoto shouted, as he flung his body towards this unknown ingredient.

    "Dick! It looks like Morimoto's finally got his bearings! We've got a fight!"

    As Morimoto sauntered towards the heaping stack of dark fleshy eggs, one of them began to unravel.

    "注意してください!(LOOK OU T!)" one of his sous chefs shouted.

    "Frying pan onigaishimasu!" Morimoto shouted valiantly as he brandished and twirled his two meat cleavers in his hands.

    Two chefs far behind him held up frying pans as ordered. A strange crablike creature violently emerged from the egg and flung itself at Morimoto with a deadly speed.

    "一瞬千撃!(ONE MOMENT  ONE THOUSAND CUT� �!)" Morimoto shouted as his twin cleavers moved faster than the eye could see.

    "Oh Barblo, I can't stand to look! This battle is going to be over before it bega-.. WAIT.. WAIT!" the announcer screamed as the crowd gasped and the face hugger split into dozens of meat cubes and landed perectly in both his sous-chefs pans.

    Le Ch'Ef glanced over at his opponent and smirked, finally grateful for a worthy opponent.

    The crowd exploded with excitement and cheers.

    "Let's see how our "Predator" is doing Dick" Barblo said, looking at the cameras and using air quotes as he said Predator with a smile.

    Le Ch'Ef was working on both a facehugger fricassé, and was in the process starting an omelet with negative pH acid glaze.

    The predator quickly grabbed his Combi-Whisk from his side and began violently beating one of the unmatured yolks into a pulp as he roared.

    He then quickly activated the chronograph module on his Brietling Chrono Avenger while his retrofitted plasmacaster raised off his shoulder and produced three infrared readings of the temperature of his fricassé. He continued the preperations of his omelet as though in a meditative trance. Gently he grabbed his most holy of relics, the spatula of Joel Robuchon and peeled the omelet mixture off the pan without causing any part to be overdone.

    "Look at that thing go! I've never seen such determination with cooking before Dick!"

    "Right you are Barblo! I can't believe it's been fifty minutes already, have we just been focused on this "Predator" the whole time? Goodness, lets see how Morimoto is wrapping things up!"

    With just seconds left on the clock, Morimoto was putting the finishing garnishes on his culinary creations.

    "Three..."

    "Two..."

    "One..."

    "AND JUST LIKE THAT DICK! THE EGG BATTLE IS OVUM!" Barblo said to the cheers of the crowd.

    Dick let out a small sigh, "Don't you mean... over?"

    "Now it's time for the taste test!" Barblo said excitedly while rubbing his hands together.

    "Let us introduce our judges for the evening!" Dick said, waiving a hand as the camera panned towards two mutilated men and a burned corpse.

    "Woah oh GOD!" Dick squeaked.

    Le Ch'Ef had already activated his cloaking mechanism and dispatched of the guest judges as soon as the camera panned off of him.

    Three large humanoids faded into being in their place, pushing aside their desecrated corpses so they could sit at the judges table.

    "Now, this is highly unusual but I believe our pre-determined guest judges have been replaced!" Barblo yelped.

    Le Ch'Ef roared at Morimoto and pointed towards the new judges.

    Morimoto understood this gesture, and brought his two dishes to the table with a confident "Hai!".

    "Hello honored judges" Morimoto said with a bow, "I have a spiny crab sashimi and a crab blood sorbet with a sugar and honey reduction.

    The judges ferociously grabbed and ate his first dish, then looked at eachother for a moment and nodded.

    Then they grabbed the second dish and screamed in unison as the acid blood scarred their tongues.

    "Ooh, looks like that acid's going to cost him some points Dick!"

    "Right you are Barblo, everyone knows you have to neutralize the acid!"

    Morimoto-san stepped aside, stunned and ashamed that he did not taste these horrific dishes himself before serving them to his honored judges.

    Le Ch'Ef stepped up with a grin and presented the judges with his plates. An alien egg fricassé and a facehugger egg omelet.

    "Interesting dishes Barblo, very clever culinary use of the lifecycle of the perfect organism." Dick remarked.

    The judges took the first plate, and cautiously took a bite after their previous traumatic experience with the sorbet.

    They looked at eachother and nodded.

    Then, they moved onto the final dish and ate it voraciously. They then stood up in unison and roared.

    By the laws of the Yautja, Le Ch'Ef had bested Iron Chef Morimoto and had thus become the greatest cook in the known Universe. Tears streamed down his eyes as he roared and ripped the white fluffy chef hat off of Morimoto as his trophy. Ever since he was a young predator almost a century ago, he had watched him from afar, using interstellar stolen technology to pirate cable and watch re-runs of Iron Chef from the Earth, dreaming of the one day he could finally challenge the most dangerous of culinary prey.

    As is tradition, it is up to the discretion of the Yautja whether or not to slay his opponent. Morimoto faught valiantly, and even at somewhat of a disadvantage he was still able to hold his own against the most feared intergalactic predatory chef. Morimoto was spared, and Le Ch'Ef was one trophy richer.

    Do you understand that any behavior that is unbecoming of a member of the community may result in you having your whitelist revoked? Such things include, but are not limited to: Racism, toxicity, excessive or malicious trolling, abuse of staff or etc.
    Yosh!

    Do you understand that you may face having your whitelist revoked, or other disciplinary action undertaken, should you be banned or warned on the CM discord?
    Yes

    Do you understand that you cannot advertise your application on any platform for votes. Do you also understand you may not edit this application 1 hour after it has been posted?
    Yes

    Do you understand that community members may report your in-game actions on the forums, and that you may be asked to defend your actions.
    Yes

  2. #2
    Senior Member BIgboyyo's Avatar
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    Don't have yautja YET so my vote doesnt matter but I'm -1'ing this because you didn't name your pred "Gor'don Ram-say"

    good meme app though
    Last edited by BIgboyyo; 07-18-2020 at 04:55 AM.
    Nathon Stafford-Sunglasses wearing Delta L42 kiter man. Sometimes a Captain.
    Benedict-Praiser of Jesus, healer of marines, killer of Queens.
    Kahn'Ikesh-Blooded Hunter and great grandson of Gor'don Ram-sey
    (pfp by Manezinho)
    medals:https://pastebin.com/xiCJLuhz
    Mapper since 12/29/2020
    Had dev role assasinated on 8/2/21


    Synth Councilor as of 2/5/21 along with Jakk, Frogzeke, Yukonsnow, and Flpls
    DM what#3954 for help with Synth Applications

  3. #3
    Head Developer Nanu308's Avatar
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    +1 looking forward to see your Vicehost application
    Head Developer & Marine Law Maintainer

  4. #4
    Whitelisted Predator superjo98's Avatar
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    +1 great app great player also he walked my dog for me IRL so overall a great guy
    I play as Dawson Hook and Brad.

  5. #5
    Senior Member
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    Good app. You can RP +1

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