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Thread: Jamesthebond - Yautja Application

  1. #1
    Senior Moderator Jamesthebond's Avatar
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    Jamesthebond - Yautja Application

    Yautja Whitelist Application
    Personal Information

    Byond ID:
    Jamesthebond

    Discord ID
    Jonathongun#0219

    Marine Name
    Jonathon "Ghost" Granger

    Character Information

    Name of the Yautja Character you wish to play
    Dalth-Rak Bo'ytill

    What clan are you joining?
    Clan Bo’ytill

    If Other (Minor Clan), what is the Clan Name?
    -

    Yautja Character Story
    This is my old Bo'ytill Clan story before the Purge
    https://docs.google.com/document/d/1...it?usp=sharing

    this is my Yautja Story
    https://docs.google.com/document/d/1...it?usp=sharing

    This is my story it involved Time travel back and forth between an ancestor and my character i hope you enjoy the back ground of the ancestor which is a blooded ancestor of my character and how he won his first trophy

    I laughed, as I was hand to hand with a human with a spear he was dresses in little to no clothing with pre civilized drapes and iron armor and a frail shield. *CLASH!* *CLING* The human Screams in fright as he does not understand he screams in latin *Victoria enim Mars!*. Side step as he lunges forward and slashed at his knee he stumbles and covers his weak points in his lower body and laughs at the odds of winning. He puts up his spear and tosses with my quick reflexes. I dodge it and wait for him to draw his next weapon which is a sword of spanish origin the earthlings call a gladiolus. i put my spear in a long stance hold and bait him into a charge and place the spear into his frontal plate which pierces his chest and comes through the other side as i stare into his lifeless eyes after he sates three words Veni, vidi, vici i suddenly feel burning through my lower abdomen and fall over.

    2261 years later….

    Humans fighting over dominance and superiority they virtually never could stop fighting against the Xenomorphs hive themselves without gunpowder. I was better of course. I used a pilum and a sword with a shield but that was in the ancestral tapes of our ancestors .

    A male enters the room. “Are you preparing for our expedition to the new worlds we discovered or not?”

    “I froze, then turned around and nodded slowly.”

    “Outstanding do you keep your childish eyes off those duels and can you not do it for one day?.”

    “I cut him off mid sentence and yelled back, maybe you should watch them, maybe you can spar better!”

    He grinned, that grin left an impression on me and left me in a state of bitter glory, I raised a wooden pole and stated maybe we need to test your sparring. As we inch to each other with weapons a female enters the room and yells at us. “WHAT ARE YOU CHILDREN DOING GET READY FOR ALPHA CENTAURI!”. I thought to myself by slaying a queen was the only way to prove myself. To my sister and brother that I'm worthy of the kill .

    Our hunting expedition was soon to come, medium size and was in alpha centauri, I’ve been told there were multiple small hives in that location and no sign of human life. I was eager to prove myself, even if I was young-blooded that was new to hunting. As i begin to climb into the pod i recall a scene from my ancestor.

    2269 years earlier…

    Day 643 the hunt for the perfect specimen i have made contact with many men who fight and die honorably yet their gods are failures in providing them the tech to level the playing field with us. I had my eye on a man of the name Marcus Victalian. I guess from the noises I recorded the language is almost translated but due to ship failure most of our tech is useless beside the camo and the rags on our back. The land is plans with mountains ive faces many people and their tribes but this is the most civil of them all. They wear dresses and forship eagles as I saw from their banners. *SCREECH*

    2269 years later …

    We finally landed. We faced no contact on landing but we had issues with the pulse converters in the engines and crash landed but this will be a hunt for glory nonetheless. My brother Ri’nin Told us to split up we are facing the largest hive of them yet.then me and my sister presided our different ways after a swift nod. I approach the entrance to the caves and hear Screams and roars in the distance and whisper damn they found them before I did. Running and leaping from trees i drop from where the screams came from then suddenly
    *BANG*

    2268 years earlier…
    I had come face to face with Marcus Victalian and nearly exposed myself and gave away my existence but I deciphered the language with the broken computers. And I think this Xeno infestation has to be put on hold since my brother and sister had died on impact and if this man proves worthy he may be of some use to me. As I leap on top of these stone structures I attract him to the open with the recordings of his men from his so-called “legion”. As he came closer and closer to the woodline I dropped down to see his sword missing me by two hands and cut a face hugger that jumped from behind me. As I stood still and spectated the man who picked up the foul creature with his sword melting, I decided he is the right man for the job. As his sword dissolves I decide to appear and grab his hand before he can strike me before a moment's notice. I point to the creature giving him the idea I need him to kill with me.

    2269 years Later…

    “WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU!” I yelled at my sister. She said back on the other side of the ledge just help me get him back to the ship he is wounded badly.Where did the humans come from they were not on our scanners none of them she said. I don't know, I exclaim I have to go for the queen and avenge our brother . she states “i have to keep our brother alive, those humans can be with us at any minute “. As i dash off into a cave i ran past a few humans and fought past a few drones but they were easy pray. I have to kill this queen i tell myself even if i have to die too.then suddenly i head screams and bangs with Man and Xeno screaming as if they were having a party without me. I guess im the smart type i guess as the the marines battle the xenos i manage to sneak in where the queens den is where she is all alone. I remember our ancestors and let them bestow their arts onto me.


    2261 years earlier…
    The human is better than I thought he went toe to toe with a crusher with a spear and shield but this hive may be my undoing but time will prove it. He had a family of sorts but i did not observe them he spends his nights mumbling about his family yet he doesn't know i understand his so called “Latin”. Tomorrow is the big day we found the queen we shall bring her out of her layer with something called “Fire oil” if it proves it’s worth.

    One day later...
    Me and the human close in on this queen the Fire oil worked as intended burning the Xeno guards to a crisp but i have no time to consider that the human is injured and he told himself his reputation is at risk he will have to end me or he will lose his position in his army. Despite that i still have to use him till im forced to end him but i will not leave him to die. I toss the human in a corner and protect him from the queen dodging left and right while stabbing at the head of the Queen. I eventually tire her down to open a weakness and stab the throat, cutting the head clean off with my sharp spear. We have done it for now. I pick the human up and carry him to the entrance of the cave in which he stands for himself and stares at me manically. In latine he says
    Hodie est die Roma in gloria and draws his spear.

    2261 later
    I had done it. The queen stands dead on the ground with my spear impaling her neck. I quickly behead her and make my escape with bullets flying all around me i make it back to the ship in which the ship was repaired by my sister. I cheer as we make our way back to the mother ship we made it out and i brought glory to my clan

    Confirmations

    Have you read the honor code and do you understand that if you breach the honor code you may be subject to disciplinary action and have your whitelist revoked for a set amount of time?
    Yes

    Did you read the application process page?
    Yes

    Do you understand that any behavior that is unbecoming of a member of the community may result in you having your whitelist revoked? Such things include, but are not limited to: Racism, toxicity, excessive or malicious trolling, abuse of staff or etc.
    Yes

    Do you understand that you may face having your whitelist revoked, or other disciplinary action undertaken, should you be banned or warned on the CM discord?
    Yes

    Do you understand that you cannot advertise your application on any platform for votes. Do you also understand you may not edit this application 1 hour after it has been posted?
    Yes

    Do you understand that community members may report your in-game actions on the forums, and that you may be asked to defend your actions.
    Yes

  2. #2
    Ancient Member Tails of Akira's Avatar
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    having multiple whitelists up at once is a bit... weird...
    Former Mentor. Now Whitelist Maintainer on Phoenix Marine.
    Ask me anything
    Mentor - 01-26-2021
    Promotion to Senior Mentor - 11-21-2021
    CMI-13 Mentor -12-3-2021
    Lost CM Mentor/Become Pheonix Marine Mentor 12-26-2021
    Phoenix Marine Whitelist Matainer 1-8-2022
    CMI-13 Synth Councillor 1-18-2022
    Zdraviya Zhelayu

  3. #3
    Senior Moderator Jamesthebond's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tails of Akira View Post
    having multiple whitelists up at once is a bit... weird...
    Forest said it was alright to do it
    Retired CSM Jonathon 'Ghost' Granger


    Discord Jonathongun#0219

  4. #4
    Junior Member Castor23's Avatar
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    Many missing commas or punctuation in general, misplaced quotation marks, randomly capitalized words or missing capitalized words, incomprehensible sentences (i.e. page 3, lines 6-7); a gladiolus is a flower and I seriously doubt a predator would even know what a gladius was unless used by some extremely worthy prey.

    The grammar of your application is abysmal and I don't want this to show on your character should you get the whitelist. I would expect this to be the standard for every other whitelist.

    -1

  5. #5
    Whitelisted Captain 50RemAndCounting's Avatar
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    You have all the time in the world to write a whitelist app, the least you can do is make it readable.

    Considering that the predator whitelist application has nothing going for it besides the story itself, it's that much important that it's good.

    -1
    Literally who is this dude? Who does he play??

  6. #6
    Ancient Member Tails of Akira's Avatar
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    I will be honest. As much as I like you, however, you're one of the more disliked CM staff and you have managed to consistently annoy a lot of players.
    Normally I'd support anyone becoming a whitelisted role and I encourage people to follow their aspiration but in this instance? I think you really shouldn't apply for anything for a bit.
    That and I'm not sure if you still play CM lately.
    Former Mentor. Now Whitelist Maintainer on Phoenix Marine.
    Ask me anything
    Mentor - 01-26-2021
    Promotion to Senior Mentor - 11-21-2021
    CMI-13 Mentor -12-3-2021
    Lost CM Mentor/Become Pheonix Marine Mentor 12-26-2021
    Phoenix Marine Whitelist Matainer 1-8-2022
    CMI-13 Synth Councillor 1-18-2022
    Zdraviya Zhelayu

  7. #7
    Moderator lunarflu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tails of Akira View Post
    I will be honest. As much as I like you, however, you're one of the more disliked CM staff and you have managed to consistently annoy a lot of players.
    To be fair, though, most of staff are disliked by some amount of players.


    Now, onto the app.
    Castor23 makes a fair summary, and overall I agree.

    The app is not timed, and instead you are given the liberty of polishing for as long as you like. Knowing this, I have immediate concerns at the low quality of your story (grammar, punctuation, the general flow). You have been staff for a good time and I commend you for that, but, as constructive criticism, I will say that it was a painful read.

    I would not be against you reapplying in the future, and if you were to polish your second attempt, I would almost certainly give you my +1. As it stands now:

    -1

  8. #8
    Assistant Manager & Whitelist Overseer
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    Denied by council majority. I was supposed to update this a while ago but it got lost in the pile.
    Charles & Arthur Edwinson
    Synth Percival | Artyom
    Yautja Kjhute Luar-ke

    Record:
    Spoiler Spoiler:



    Discord: forest2001#2001

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