Infant's Rimworld Adventure

[Infant Punter]

After buying and having a good run on one successful colony on Rimworld, I decided to make another run, with the colonists personafied as some of our horrendously corrupt lovely staff team! THIS IS THE STORY OF HOW IT WENT SO WRONG. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ We start off with our roster of entirely randomly generated characters, whom I gave identities as I saw fit.

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Firstly, our DASHINGLY HANDSOME AND SUCCESSFUL DOCTOR, yours truly.

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Next, the jack-of-all trades bodyguard, West.

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The architech/pyromaniac, STL.

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Scrat, our edgy mercenary assassin who feels no pain and shoots things good. ...no, really.

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Finally, we have... this guy, who also ended up being randomed as STL's dad.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ SO BEGAN THE JOURNEY! warning: bigass box of story stuff

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Here we begin, with our little band of misfits getting their bearings on their new purgatory. The gloriously handsome and swift leader gets right to work, along with his lackies, who begin taking apart decayed buildings for salvage. Well... most of them. Before long, they have a nice little hut in the side of a hill set for them to reside. They even pick up some weirdo names Reeves. And for a while, it goes well. Not counting West's regular night terrors, causing everyone else to need to beat him into submission. I also quickly arranged to have the problem of dobbin... interacting, with anyone else, solved. He even got his own little cave cage bedroom. Meanwhile, the production picks up, the potatoes are planted, dobbin is forced into menial labor, all is well. Until, you know, Dobbin has a spaz attack due to his ugly nudist lifestyle being denied with clothes, and tries to shank people. So, he's promptly beaten mercilessly negotiated into submission. He was then healed. And got upset again. Which was handled by Scrat. His bitch fits got him a /little/ roughed up. Maybe I could just... just... ...no, no. ANYWHO. We held off our first attack of goon pirates who wanted to steal our half-grown potatoes, relatively easy. Then later the potato harvest came, so I assigned the properly ironic irishmen to their duties. Some huts are built for everyone, so they don't need to share some grimey barracks. I get that beautiful master bedroom, of course. Not soon into peacetime, fucking artillery siege pirates decide to invade and work on setting up a camp just northwest of my base. ASSEMBLE THE A-TEAM. After a night of fighting, the A-Team reduced the pirates enough to force an offensive. GLORIOUS VICTORY. no thanks to dobbin. I reduced him to a janitor at this point. Maybe he'll be useful. Meanwhile, a poor spaceman landed in a crashed escape pod and needs help! Their skills seemed worthy for our time, so, I had them saved. We heal her, and then she... tries to, leave, and not join? Oh HELL no. GODDAMNIT SCRAT. Well no time to be upset, FLASH LIGHTNING STORMS, HUGE FIRES EVERYWHERE. THERE'S EVEN A DINOSAUR SHAPED FIRE. AND THE FIRE BURNED OPEN A CHAMBER FULL OF DEATH ROBOTS. THEY EVEN KILLED MY DAMN DOG. Luckily, STL flanked them with an incendiary launcher... All while Dobbin, you know. Sleeps. Then the A-Team came down with some sickness, our luck. STL decided to throw West a dying party, or something. BUT THEN SCRAT'S LONG LOST CHILD AND HIS GROUP OF HOOLIGANS DECIDED TO TRY AND MURDER US ALL WITH MORE MORTARS. All in all, Scrat's a shitty dad. STL is in a daze of rage for eating without a table, so, he shrugs off being hit by a mortar during all this. Our glorious MVP sleeps through people trying to break down his door. Though, believe it or not, he ESCAPES that, then makes it over to the rest, where he was actually USEFUL! He helped, hooray! Then, we go into recovery stage from that large attack. Finally, some time to lick our wounds, get our bearings, starts working o- FUCKING SHIT. DOUBLE SHIT. Well. I guess we survived. Kinda. STL is kinda broken up about the loss of his house. But on a good note, we got a kitchen in the back made, AND some batteries to store power for the solar panels outside. Of course they went right next to Dobbin. And then some... trader friends. A LOT OF TRADER FRIENDS. One could only wonder what disturbed our sleep? The pressure from all the distress so far sends me into the woods naked for a while, I guess. Alright. Then it happened. The next wave. The HUGE wave, very heavily armored death pirate mongoloids. Not taking this shit without a fight. We're gonna BUILD IT. DEFEND IT. THIS IS OUR ALAMO. WE WILL WIN. we didn't win. dobbin went into a mental break again so we lost the fight by a landslide of grenades and terror. rip us. the end.

10/10

[Scrat505]

10/10 adventure
would see adapted into a movie

[YungCuz]

This was amazing is there gonna be more Adventures?
also if there is can i be included possssiblllyyyyyy...?

[Infant Punter]

I might make more adventures, depending on feedback from this, and depending on if I decide to put myself through that again.

[LordeKilly]

Pretty good stuff. Don't forget to try out that colon murhreen mod, it adds in some cool stuff (not aliens unfortunately)

[Warnipple]

I can't believe I read through all that.

You need to recruit more survivors and rename them to more staff/players.

[Desolane900]

0/10 doesn't have Saul Freytia.

[coroneljones]

10/11
Needs more Jones

[Jdobbin49]

10/10 perfect Dobbs recreation

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Please give me a new character....

[Kavlo]

8/8 m8.

[ShortTemperedLeprechaun]

2 questions. What the fuck is that unicorn thing in one of the images, and 2, when will we have another escapade to be a part of/witness?

[LordeKilly]

2 questions. What the fuck is that unicorn thing in one of the images, and 2, when will we have another escapade to be a part of/witness?

Unicorn thing is a thrumbo, they're a bitch to kill but mostly passive. Only reason to kill them is for their horns, which sell for an asston of silver.

[Whistle]

Ah rim world, awesome.

That unicorn looking thing is exactly that, a space unicorn, you can sell its horn for lots a moula.

[TR-BlackDragon]

Not a bad read

[Karmac]

Needs more of my British-Cripple character.

[Westhybrid]

10/10 plague

[MrMafioso]

10/10 would read again, I'd post my own Rimworld adventure's but I barely happen to make it past the 1st few days, like the 4th raid comes and I'm fucked

[Ogard]

I might post my cannibal ice sheet adventures on Rim World, that lasted quite a long time, good read though.

[MrMafioso]

The epic adventures of the Muhreens I like shall be posted when I can be arsed too.